10 "Easy" Steps to Being Blissfully Happy ... and Staying that Way!

10 step lists have always amused and bemused me for their simpleness, whilst knowing that they also held something positive within them. But we all know they aren't really as "easy" as they claim to be!

I actually have this "easy" button and used to use it for meetings. It was silly but got the point across to people who loved to complicate things!

It has taken me many years of spiritual self-study (Svadhyaya), yoga, meditation, mantra, therapy, past-life regression, energy healing, accupuncture, chiropractor, vegetarianism, travel, art, research and reading to name a few, in order to be able to harmoniously reconnect opposing energies  (Aadays Tisai Aadays is a mantra that helps do just that) that continuously construct and destruct happiness and turn a difficult process into "easy" steps.

All this work has guided  me to my one and only interest in life which is to be happy. It is in fact what the Dalai Lama said at the Hollywood Bowl in Los Angeles in 1999 (amongst other wise words). What I took away from that visit was "just... be happy! hahahaha!"

But it hasn't been easy mainly because we spend most of our lives trying to make others happy (at times knowingly and at times unknowingly searching for love) rather than trying to make our own selves happy (and developing self-love). I have found and lost my happiness many times over the span of my life so far, (and I don't think I am finished with this fascinating search for happiness), but I think I have found a few pearls of wisdom along the way that can be helpful at least in terms of finding the path towards happiness. So here it is:

1. Maintain an open heart: Even though we may get hurt in life, healing the heart is of utmost importance since it is our gate to joy, fulfillment and abundance.
2. Play: Nurture the child within whilst being a responsible human being. Playing is not only part of our joy but also part of our growth. Playing without any desire to win. Playing without hurting yourself. Playing and being playful are synonymous. Being playful without hurting others of course, is the name of the game.
3. Seek the truth: In order to be trusting of the world in which we live in we need to feel safe enough to open up our hearts so that we can play. When we are naive and don't care for the consequences of our casual attitude towards life, we tend to find some not so nice surprises along the way. Much to our unfortunate realization, ignorance is not bliss. 
4. Develop discipline: This may be difficult for some people who don't like to limit themselves in any way. True freedom is not doing whatever we feel like doing anytime we feel like doing it. True freedom is taking into consideration everything and everyone before acting. There is always a price to pay for selfishness that can knock us down further than we ever expected. Developing discipline also develops respect for the self and respect for others.  Without some kind of discipline (although the most effective is spiritual discipline) we develop habits that become much harder to break in the long run. And habits are a form of self-bondage.
5. Surround your home with symbols that open your heart and make you feel safe: Whatever we call home, whether it be a house, an apartment, a room or a hotel bed can be turned into a personal haven if we adorn it with the love that is within us. If we share a room, then using one angle of the room and creating a small alter with miniature symbols with some images, photos, items that remind us of what we believe in and feel connected to, will remind us of what makes us happy.
6. Face your fears on a regular basis: In order to be happy we need to nurture the positive aspects of our personality and keep releasing the negative aspects. This is divine work that requires courage which is why having some kind of personal discipline is important. 
7. Be honest with yourself and with others: There is nothing more destructive than lying. It causes all kinds of mental problems which then manifest in real life problems that multiply faster than you'd imagine. Once you honestly look at yourself instead of running away like a scared bunny, and you face your fears, you will be able to live life with honesty, fearlessly knowing deep within you that you are clean ("Sauca") of corruptive energy.
8. Face your ego: The ego or Satan (From Hebrew: הַשָּׂטָן ha-Satan), "the opposer". "This lower nature in man is symbolized as Satan — the evil ego within us, not an evil personality outside.") is so infamous that by now it must be howling in pain as so many people have broken the ego code and are burning it in the fire of yoga! But... it always has a way of creeping up on us that little bugger! So constantly revising your belief systems, inner blocks, complaints (they are great indicators of our blocks... blocks feed the ego!) and the people around us... which brings me to number 9.
9. Don't be afraid to release... everything: When we are honest with ourselves and courageous enough to be so, we can then honestly look at the people in our lives with more accuracy. We don't choose the family in which we are born into (although previous to birth we do ;-), but we do have the conscious choice of inviting friends into our lives. We have more freedom than we realize. If we want to be free, then we need to surround ourselves with freedom. This doesn't mean we can't have compassion for those who are still chained to various forms of self-imprisonment. We are simply free to choose who and what to bring into our personal paradise in order to stay happy. So now number 10 is, as the Dalai Lama said:
10. Just be happy hahahaha! Choose to be happy. It's that simple. If you have awareness of your ego, if you are honest, if you are not a selfish or self-centered person, if you have developed self-awareness and you don't run away from your life challenges, then you have every reason to not just be happy but stay happy too. You no longer have to worry about anyone raining on your parade because you are the creator of your parade. You are not blindly happy because of something outside of you, but because you have found happiness within you.

At times just one step is sufficient to lead us on the path to happiness that lasts. When we are up and down and our emotions keep us on a roller coaster, we are actually dependent on external reasons to be happy such as my all time favorite, the weather! When the sun is shining we are happy and when it's not, we accept that we need to be unhappy that it's not shining. But the sun will shine (or not) whether we like it (or not) so basically it cannot be responsible for our happiness. If it shines, great! It's like the cherry on top of the sundae.

Staying happy is a job that is done daily and on our own. Two people who work at staying happy independently of each other, contribute to staying friends. The same goes with marriage. People get divorced because they depend on each other to be happy.  So goes without saying that staying married depends on staying happy. One person's happiness should make the other happy. Two people's happiness without attachments and dependencies to external sources of illusory happiness, stay together because their relationship is based on inner happiness. And of course all this leads to a happier world with less pain and sorrow.

Surprise there is a number 11! (The number 11 is highly divine and gives extra power to letting go of thoughts and setting intentions).

11. Release expectations: Living without having expectations of ourselves or of others is one of the greatest freedoms that can lead us to happiness. Expectations put unnecessary pressure on everyone and causes psychological damage in children. Knowing what we are capable of and doing our best should be enough. Having unrealistic expectations is like telling a cat to bark.

Releasing expectations also helps avoid judgment, anger, frustration and criticism. If you don't have any expectations you are free to create and to find the space within to find your own way. You cannot judge what is not yours to control. And likewise, if you release expectations the freedom you will experience will bring you the kind of inner joy that supports and heals rather than criticizing the unmanifested illusions of your expectations.

Well that should be enough to get you running to your nearest liquor store!

Happy trails to all and may your path be lit by Truth.

Namastè.